My name is Darkness.
My calling is that of a crusader.
Would you please...
Would you please let me join your p-p-party?
Um...
Those two slimy ladies earlier were allies of yours, right?
What in the world did that to them?
Oh, uh...
They were swallowed by Giant Toads, and the mucus—
What?!
It's worse than I imagined...
What's with this woman knight?
No, wait!
As a knight, I cannot overlook such horrors befalling two girls
of such a tender age!
Her eyes are scaring me...
She's setting off my danger radar.
It's telling me something's up with her, just like Aqua and Megumin.
No, I'd advise against it.
It's hard to say how useful one of our members is,
another can only use her magic once per day,
and I'm the lowest job class.
Our party's total trash,
so I'd recommend you look elsewhe— Ow, ow, ow!
That's even better!
The truth is, this was a bit difficult for me to say,
but while I have confidence in my strength and stamina, I am clumsy...
So, um...
None of my attacks ever hit their mark.
Looks like my sensor was spot-on.
As such,
I'll charge to the front line,
so please use me as a shield!
Her face is too close!
The negative effects of my long life as a shut-in are kicking in now?!
No, that isn't it!
This is just too stimulating for an adolescent virgin like me!
Stay calm... Don't be seduced by her womanly charms!
No.
I could never use a woman as a shield.
It would be my pleasure!
Well, we get eaten by monsters in every battle.
That would be even more my pleasure!
Oh, I get it.
It's not just her abilities. She's hopeless to the core.
KONOSUBA God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
Episode 3
"A Panty Treasure in This Right Hand!"
I was so worn out, I slept until noon...
Hup!
There!
Thank you! Thank you!
Thank you!
Oh, look, Kazuma!
What do you think of my newly acquired skill?
Isn't it befitting of a water goddess like myself?
Isn't that a party trick skill, you low-grade goddess?
KONOSUBA!
You can learn skills with the points you've saved up, huh?
I'll have to be careful not to use them on any weird skills.
First you get someone to teach you how to use a skill.
Then the entry will appear on your card.
If you use your points on that entry, you'll finish learning it.
Does that mean if I have you teach me,
I could learn to use explosion magic, too?
Exactly!
That's exactly right, Kazuma!
If you want to learn explosion magic,
I'll teach you as much as you want!
Heck, is there any other skill more worthwhile to learn?
No, there certainly is not!
Come, now, and walk the path of explosions with me!
Her face is too close...
Hey, calm... calm down, little girl!
Besides, I only have three points right now...
L-Little girl?
Huh?
I'm a little girl?
I wonder if there's some quick and easy skill...
One that'll be a good value, that doesn't take many points to learn.
I've been looking for you.
Oh, no!
You said you had too much to drink yesterday
and headed straight home...
N-No need to worry!
I was trying to turn her down gently.
Looks like my intentions didn't get through to her at all!
Shall we continue where our conversation left off yesterday?
Please let me join your party—
I refuse.
Such a snap decision!
Huh? That made her happy?
She's dangerous!
That won't do, Darkness.
You can't be so pushy.
Um, and you are?
I'm Chris, a thief, as you can see.
This girl is my friend, I guess?
Thank goodness.
This one seems like a relatively competent person.
You seem to be in need of a useful skill.
How about a thief skill?
Huh?
It takes very few points to learn, so it's a good value.
I'm sure it would come in handy.
How about it?
If you act now, I'll do it for the cost of a drink.
That's cheap!
All right, please do!
Excuse me! One ice-cold drink for this lady over here!
KONOSUBA!
So,
there are all sorts of thief skills, like "Enemy Detection" and "Lurk,"
but I recommend this one in particular.
Here I go. Watch carefully.
Right! I'm ready, Chris-san!
Steal!
Hey! My coin pouch!
This is the thief skill "Steal."
If it's successful, you can take possession of your opponent's property.
So that's how you use it.
Huh...
Hey, want to have a showdown?
Learn this thief skill yourself,
then steal this pouch back from me.
Hey, isn't that overdoing it a bit?
He's an adventurer, isn't he?
Crossing dangerous bridges comes with the territory.
A high tuition fee, huh?
Still,
this is exactly the sort of exchange between rowdy adventurers that I've been craving!
At long last,
it's my first adventure-like event since coming to this world!
Sure!
Then it's settled.
Use your adventurer card and acquire the skill.
The skills you learned from me should be displayed there.
Enemy Detection: one point.
Lurk: one point.
Pilfer: one point.
Nature's Beauty...
"Nature's Beauty"?
Oh...
That's the party trick skill your ally used earlier.
Five points for a measly party trick?
That's steep!
Yeah, I won't need this.
Okay! The thief skills you chose are now yours!
Come at me anytime!
All right!
Whatever I steal from you, don't cry about it!
A success will net you this magic dagger.
It's a fine item that wouldn't go for less than 400,000 eris.
Wow!
And the consolation prize will be...
These rocks!
That's dirty!
This will greatly lower the odds that you'll nab the dagger.
Damn.
This really was enlightening.
This isn't Japan.
It's survival of the fittest in this world.
Any gullible fool who gets tricked has himself to blame.
I'll do it!
Steal!
All right! Looks like it worked!
What's this?
Oh! This is just as great a success!
I hit the jackpot!
No! G-Give me back my panties!
Wh-What a savage act.
It appears my eyes didn't lead me astray!
KONOSUBA!
Oh, Kazuma.
Where have you been?
You missed my dazzling tricks.
Wait, what's with her?
Actually...
Indeed.
She's just depressed because, when she taught Kazuma thief skills,
her panties were stripped off, then all the money she had on her was taken.
Hey, what are you blurting out?!
He said giving back his coin pouch wouldn't be enough,
so I said I'd pay any price
if he'd just return my panties...
But then he told me to decide what they were worth on my own!
Whoa, hold on! Hold on!
You're not wrong, but seriously, hold on!
He said if I didn't, they'd be revered
within his family as an heirloom from now on!
Hey!
The eyes of every female adventurer around us are turning stone-cold!
Seriously, wait a second!
So, Kazuma, were you able to learn the thief skills without any trouble?
Well, see for yourself.
Here I go!
Steal!
What's this?
What happened?
Did your stats go up with your level,
allowing you to change jobs from "adventurer" to "pervert"?
Um, it's a bit drafty, so please give me back my panties.
Kazuma, you...
H-Huh? That's strange.
What you steal should be random...
To strip such a young girl of her panties
in a public place is truly savage!
I can't let this pass!
You must let me join your party!
No, thanks.
This chick is definitely the hopeless type.
I can't let any more weirdos into our party.
Hey, Kazuma.
Is this the person you mentioned
who came for an interview while Megumin and I were in the bath yesterday?
KONOSUBA!
Hey, this lady is a crusader!
We shouldn't have any reason to turn her down.
Crap...
Look at this. She's a crusader.
I really didn't want to let these two meet her.
All right, I guess I can play that card.
Darkness,
there's something I have to tell you.
The thing is...
Aqua and I may not look like much,
but we seriously intend to defeat the Devil King.
Uh-huh.
Oh?
You do?
Yeah. Awesome, isn't it?
Our adventure is bound to become more and more rigorous.
For you in particular, Darkness.
If a female knight like you
were to be captured by the Devil King, it'd be bad news.
You'd be sure to suffer a horrendous fate!
Yes, that's exactly right.
Since old times,
suffering an erotic fate at the hands of the Devil King
has always been the duty and expectation of a female knight.
That alone makes it worthwhile to go!
Wait, what?
Huh? What is it?
Did I say something strange?
I-I'll take care of this one later!
You listen up, too, Megumin.
Our opponent is the Devil King.
We're picking a fight with the strongest being in this world.
There's no need to force yourself to stay in a party like—
My name is Megumin!
I am a user of the finest magic crimson demons possess,
and I command explosion magic!
The Devil King fancies himself superior to us and dares call himself "strongest"!
I shall obliterate his vile presence with our strongest of magics!
This one's a lost cause, too...
What should I do?
I made these two embarrassing girls even more motivated.
Kazuma, Kazuma...
I've kind of gotten cold feet now that I've heard all this.
Isn't there some easier way?
You should be the most motivated of all.
In fact, this concerns you most of all.
Emergency quest! Emergency quest!
What is it this time?
All adventurers, please gather at the front gate at once.
I repeat: all adventurers,
please gather at the front gate at once!
They're coming!
It can't be! No one told me it was happening today!
Don't let the children outside!
Oh, no! Oh, no!
You're all ready for this, right?
Better get psyched up!
What is it? What's coming?
I'll protect everyone.
Kazuma, stay close to me.
What's the emergency quest?
Is it a monster attack?
Didn't they say? It's cabbage. Cabbage!
Huh?
Looks like it'll be rough this year...
A storm is coming.
Harvest time!
Bring out the mayonnaise!
What the hell is this?!
Cabbage, cabbage!
Compulsory Quest
Defeat All the Cabbages Flying into the City
Go!
In this world, cabbages fly.
When they reach optimal flavor and harvest season approaches,
they don't just sit back and let themselves be eaten.
It's said they careen through the cities and grasslands,
cross the continent and ocean,
and finally quietly pass away
in a secluded region unknown to man, without being eaten.
If that's the case,
let's catch as many as possible,
and make them into delicious meals to eat!
Everyone!
The annual cabbage harvesting season has arrived!
This year's cabbages are of fine quality,
and will go for 10,000 eris per head harvested!
Please capture as many cabbages as you can and lock them up here!
Can I just go home and go to bed?
Kazuma.
This is a perfect opportunity.
See my ability as a crusader with your own eyes.
She's not hitting a single one!
Look out!
I'll handle this! Get away while you can!
Darkness!
Wh-What?!
Her armor!
I-It's no use!
Run away by yourself!
Don't be foolish!
Darkness, you...
How could I ever abandon
those who have fallen?!
She's a model knight!
Hurry and run away, Lady Knight!
They're watching me...
These uncultured men
are looking at my skin and getting aroused!
How shameful!
So filthy!
Incredible!
She's enjoying it?!
I can't believe she's going to such lengths to protect him!
As a knight, I must learn from her example.
No! You guys have it all wrong!
None can stand in opposition of my lethal explosion magic.
She's gonna give people the wrong idea, too!
Could I possibly resist the urge to unleash explosion magic
when faced with such a massive enemy army?
No, I can't!
Yes, you can!
Oh, blackness shrouded in light...
Frenzied blaze clad in night...
In the name of the crimson demons,
let the collapse of thine origin manifest.
Summon before me the root of thy power hidden within the lands
of the kingdom of demise!
Explosion!
Special Bonus
Abundant Cabbage Harvest
Well, we won't run short on vegetables for a good while!
I refuse to accept this.
How can a simple cabbage stir-fry be so tasty?
I didn't come to a parallel world to fight cabbage.
I'd expect no less from a crusader.
It's no surprise that
those cabbages had a tough time breaching your iron-clad defenses.
No, I'm just a solidly-built woman.
Becoming a wall to protect someone is all I'm good for.
Aqua's Nature's Beauty was splendid, as well.
She boosted the morale of all the adventurers,
and preserved the freshness of the harvested cabbage with cold water.
Nature's Beauty!
It was nothing.
Here!
That's only natural for an arch priest who heals everyone.
Here!
Thank you.
Is that important?
An arch priest's magical water is very pure!
Really?
Megumin's magic was astounding, too!
Really?
You blew away the entire swarm of cabbages in a single blow!
Really?
Have you now seen the power of the crimson demon bloodline?
Impressive.
Yes. I've never taken a direct hit with such firepower before.
Don't let her hit you directly!
Oh, Kazuma!
You weren't half bad yourself!
Indeed.
When you erase your presence with the Lurk skill
Steal!
and attack the enemy from behind with Steal,
you look just like a skilled assassin.
Kazuma, by my name,
I hereby confer upon you the title of "The Great Cabbage Thief."
Oh, shut up!
Jeez, how did things end up like this?
Most importantly, you now understand my abilities as a crusader.
So, once more...
My name is Darkness.
I can use swords with either hand,
but don't expect me to be a powerhouse in battle.
I'm far too clumsy, and my attacks hardly ever hit their mark.
However, I'm very good at becoming a wall!
Our party is turning out to have a pretty impressive roster, huh?
There's me, an arch priest,
Megumin, an arch wizard,
and Darkness, a crusader.
There aren't many parties where three out of four members are advanced job classes!
I'm looking forward to working with you.
I wouldn't have any real reason to refuse if she were a normal ally, either.
Yes, pleased to have you.
She's gorgeous, after all. But still...
So, Kazuma, please don't hesitate to use me
as a decoy or wall anytime from now on.
She's one of those people...
A total masochist.
Although this seems like a perfect lineup, it's anything but.
I foresee nothing but hardships in our future...
If I should do anything to hold back the party,
please reprimand me sternly.
You may even abandon me as a sacrificial pawn if you wish.
J-Just imagining it makes me tremble with excitement!
Once again, I'm looking forward to working with you!
To my teacher at school. I'm currently learning in a parallel world... The workings of its society, what it is to be human, and what it means to be alive. It makes me grateful that all the wonderful events transpiring here make me grow as a person. I'm so grateful, it makes me tear up. There isn't a single night I haven't soaked my pillow in tears. Uh, I mean that in a good way. A good way, okay?
Episode 4
Explosion Magic for This Formidable Enemy!